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Category Archives: Womanhood

To all mothers and mothers in waiting your walk with God is very vital to the successful training of your child in the way of the Lord. You can only give what you have and not what you have not Acts3:6. If your walk with God is questionable, then your children’s walk with God will be questionable too. Likeness, if your walk with God is worthy of emulation, your children’s walk with God will make Him proud of you and your children. One vital way of walking with God, is through your fellowship with Him. How strong is your devotion to God? How strong is the cord of relationship binding you with God? As a mother your time with God is very important, irrespective of the fact that you have a busy schedule– especially if you are a working mother. God expects you to have time to be with Him in the midst of your busy and overcrowded time schedule. In fact God wants your best time and not your leftover. You must cultivate a habit of seeking Him first thing in the morning that means as a mother you must rise up early, even though you are the last to go to bed. Prov31:15,18 “she gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family and for her servants…..she knows when to buy and sell, and she stays busy until late at night” (Contemporary English Version). As you wake up early at night to lift your household before the Lord, God gives you direction as to how to run the affairs of your home, and also God stays the hands of the evil one over your family. The devil will never have the opportunity to sow tares in the lives of your love ones, as you are always alight in the spirit; spiritually you are on fire. The devil can only sow tares, when you are in sleepy state –physically and spiritually. “How do I cultivate a meaningful relationship with God, how do I stay permanently connected, even in my moments of discouragement and struggles? In order to attempt to answer the above questions, we must start from the very beginning.

Overcoming the Guilt Feeling.

Nothing kills the joy of meeting with God than guilt. Recurring guilt is perhaps the most frequent struggle in our walk with God. We wonder why we do not feel right with God or why we haven’t spent more time with Him or for Him. Most of us have tried, but we have puzzled over what it really should be and we have felt miserable over our failures. The reason why this part of our faith is so troublesome and so hard to grasp is because we do not know what we are pursuing. As mothers we must get past the guilt feeling and pursue after God, strive to know Him on a personal note.

Getting Personal with God.

Surprisingly, most of us live as if God were not a person, most suspect that He exists but never live as if they expect to meet Him face to face/person to person. We claim a personal faith, yet our relationship with God is impersonal. We believe God is Holy, Righteous and Almighty. But these qualities keep us from seeing Him as a person, so God becomes someone we put on a pedestal so far above us that He ceases to be a person. The reason we meet with God is to know Him as personally as possible. This is the mystery of meeting with God. God said in Gen1:26 “let us make man (woman) in our own image, after our likeness….” It is not a flesh and blood image but a personality image—a person with intellect, emotions and will. God provided us with three experiences to help us understand how we are made in His image. Using our intellectual ability help us learn the mind of God, our minds was made so that we could know God. The relationship at this level involves two thinking persons. Hence God said in Isa1:18 “come now, and let us reason (think) together”. In our devotional time with God we bring our thoughts in line with His, thereby rubbing our small minds with His Superior Mind and we come out as superstars. The second experience is expressed in marriage. We learn to use our emotions by loving someone else. In this experience God teaches us that He is an emotional person. Love is a priority for our relationship with God. When you are in love with someone you always crave the presence of that person. Whenever you are around that person, everybody around you knows you are in a relationship with that person. There is a love bond between you too. This is how it should be with us and God. Unfortunately, this is not so for most of us. Your love expression for God is easily expressed and explained by your love for your spouse. If your devotional time with God is boring and a mere act of duty, then check yourself, if you are sincere, you will discover you are having a struggle with your relationship with your spouse. The third experience God gave us is expressed in our obedience to His commands—the use of our will or choices. God is a person of will as we are. To have a personal relationship with God, you need to know and respect His will, just as He knows and respect your will. God gave us a mind to know Him and to bring into harmony with His Mind, a heart to love Him and to bring into harmony with His Heart and a will to obey Him and to bring into harmony with His Will. God made us to be so like Him, so that we could know Him to the fullest of our created ability. In conclusion, we could say according to Dr Dwight Pentecost “what a man truly knows he will love, and what he truly loves, he will serve. This is what being personal with God is all about—knowing, loving and serving. This is what makes devotional time possible.

If it is this simple, why is it so hard for me to be personal with God.

Adam’s sin of disobedience in the Garden of Eden corrupted the perfect image of personality we had with God. Sin erupted that relationship of communing with God in the cool of the day. Since then our ability to know God has been darkened; our love for God has been degraded; and our ability to obey Him disabled. We no longer naturally seek Him. We find it hard to love Him with pure motives and to obey Him becomes difficult. No wonder God doesn’t seem very personal to us anymore. Thank God for the coming of Christ, He restored us back to that fellowship of intimacy with God through His death on the Cross. He reconciled us back to God, so that we can get personal with God again 2Cor5:17-19. God through the atoning death of Jesus Christ changed our corrupted image back to the original image 2Cor3:18. God through Christ gave us back the ability to know, love and serve Him. This is what life as a mother is all about, to know God as deeply as you can and to translate that knowledge into the training of your children. Thereby raising children after God’s heart. This is life eternal, that we as mothers might know Him, as the only true God and Jesus Christ whom He sent (Jn17:3). The knowledge of God is the best possession you can have in life as a mother, for it brings with it joy, delight and contentment. Another obstacle, to our being friends with God comes in the form of barrier of formality. We have been taught to revere God, and God Himself commanded it but He is also our Father and we are a family, He went out of His way to adopt us Rom8:15, so we are to maintain a close familiar relationship with Him. How will you feel as a mother when your child calls you, “Mrs. Your Surname”, rather he calls you mum or mama. Jesus always referred to God as Father. God also wants us to refer to Him as Daddy. In your closet call Him an informal name. In Isa54:5, the bible says, your maker is your husband, so why don’t you call Him some sweet names like Darling, Love of my life, my Sunshine or you can call Him some special names in your local dialect. When you do this you are establishing an intimate relationship with Him. Devotion is all about relationship, the one you have a relationship with, you will always want to be with. We find it difficult to enjoy a time of devotion with Him because we do not have a relationship with Him. Our time of devotion is just a mere act of duty and nothing else. Mothers let us develop an attitude of friendship with our divine Lover and Husband, who is ready and patience enough to listen to all our real and imagined frustrations, and moments of joys we encounter as we raise a godly family that will glorify God. He gave us the husbands and the children, He knows these precious individuals very well, and He alone can help us to understand the workings of their minds. This makes being a wife and a mother, a thing to be cherished, a duty to be carried out with gladness of heart. As we walk with God on a friendly note, we shall enjoy the blessedness of motherhood in Jesus Name. Amen.

A Prayer for Mothers

Most Gracious Heavenly Father ,

I thank you for every mother to whom You have entrusted the care of every precious human life from its very beginning in the womb.

You have given to woman, the capacity of participating with You in the creation of new life. Grant that every woman will come to understand the full meaning of that blessing.

Watch over every mother who is with a child, strengthen her faith in Your Fatherly care and love for her and her unborn baby. Give her courage in times of fear or pain, understanding in times of uncertainty and doubt, and hope in times of trouble. Grant her joy in the birth of her child.

Grant that all mothers may worthily foster the faith of their children, following the examples of the holy women in the Bible who followed Christ. Help mothers to grow daily in knowledge and understanding of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, and grant them the wisdom to impart this knowledge faithfully to their children and to all who depend upon them.

 For all the mothers in waiting, Father as You answered the cries of women like Sarah, Rachel, Hannah and Elizabeth, grant unto them their heart desires also. Let them also experience the joy of motherhood as they serve You faithfully, trusting in Your undying love and faithfulness. Help them to fulfill their destinies as mothers.

I beseech You to send Your Holy Spirit, the Comforter, to all mothers who sorrow for children that have died, are ill or estranged from their families, or who are in trouble or danger of any kind. Help grieving mothers to rely on Your tender mercy and Fatherly love for all Your children.

I ask your blessing on all those to whom You have entrusted motherhood. May Your Holy Spirit constantly inspire and strengthen them. May all mothers receive YourGrace abundantly in this earthly life, may they look forward to eternal joy in Your Presence in the life to come. As we celebrate Mothers’ day, make the joy of every mother be full. In Jesus Name I pray Amen.

Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, Managing Director, World ...

Let me start by making some few definitions, for proper understanding of the topic of discussion.

Who is a Christian?

The Oxford dictionary defines a Christian as “a person who believes in the Christian religion“. The Wycliffe Bible dictionary defines a Christian as “one who belongs or is devoted to Christ”. Being a Christian is not just understanding certain doctrines and spiritual principles, but it is having our life in Christ Jesus. It is walking in the Spirit of Truth. The Truth here “is a property of that judgment which coincides with the mind of God”. So it will not be wrong to say that “a Christian is one whose walk is in agreement with the mind of Christ concerning every areas of his or her life 1Cor2:16. That means a Christian is one whose character and conduct reflects the character and conduct of the Risen Lord Jesus Christ”. If your walk is contrary to the Mind of Christ concerning your life; and your character and conduct does not reflect Christ, then you are not a Christian even if you claim to be one.

Who is a Lady?

The Oxford dictionary defines a lady as “a woman with dignity and good manners. So I will define a true Christian lady as a celebrated woman of rare and outstanding talent, a woman of class, integrity, honor and poise; a spiritually, emotionally and physically stable woman. A divinely set apart woman. (A diva) We have quite a number of such women in our midst. We have women like: Pst. (Mrs.) Faith Oyedepo, Pst. (Mrs.) Mary Abioye, Pst. (Mrs.) E. Aremu, Bishop Margaret Idahosa, Gloria Copeland, Elizabeth George, Joyce Meyer, Michelle McKinney Hammond, Cindy Trimm, Mrs. Diezani Allison Madueke Mrs. Oby Ezekwesili and Mrs. Ngozi Okonjo- Iweala to mention a few. As a Christian Lady you represent your heavenly Father here on earth. Your life, marriage etc must reflect that you are the daughter of the King of kings and the Lord of lords. Your life must bless people; you must not leave a place without leaving your mark behind. You must always leave a lasting impression of integrity, and poise in the hearts of those who interacts with you; because a deposit of the divine nature of God was planted in your spirit when He created you. You are set apart for a unique purpose, with divine credentials for living out your calling. An invisible stamp was placed on you the moment you became born again, which makes everyone that sees you to recognize that you are special. As a celebrated woman of class, your success in life is hinged on your close relationship with God, ability to hear His Voice, coupled with your submission to His direction. Having a kingdom view of life, should be our driving force in life. Matt6:33.

The Make-up of a True Christian Lady (a Diva).

There is a seed of divinity in every woman. That seed is the divine nature of God put inside every woman, when she was created by God. It is the Spirit of God. It is this divine nature in a true Christian lady that makes her to command attention without demanding it. This divine seed was lost at the fall of man, but on the Cross of Calvary Jesus restored that divine nature back to the woman. He gave us His divine mind, which is a major prerequisite for living a fulfilled life, filled with purposeful decision and security. The thing that sets a true Christian lady apart and makes her distinct from the rest women is the composite of her character. Her internal qualities which continually transforms her outer appearance and give her a royal bearing. She carries herself with a touch of royalty, irrespective of her status in life, whether she is doing menial jobs or she is an executive in a big organization. She is graceful and gracious; doing whatever she does in excellence without despising her femininity.

Her Spirituality.

A true Christian lady is spiritual. She has embraced her Savior and yielded to His Lordship, so under His instruction she is empowered to see her circumstances clearly, make wise choices and reap a victorious life. For you to be celebrated truly set apart woman, your attitude or view about who you are must change.

There are three (3) views that inform who you are in life.

A. Your personal view about yourself: this is limited by your emotions and what you have to go through in life. B. Other people’s views about you: This is based on their own experiences in life. C. God’s view about you: He is the only one who has a valid opinion about you. He knows, sees and understands everything about you. When we are in a relationship with our heavenly Father, we begin to see things through His eyes. A true Christian lady will not compromise her standards and she is completely sold out to her Lord, she is not moved by the opinion of other people concerning her. She is rooted and grounded in the love of God, so other people’s opinion no longer matter to her Song of Sol 2:16.

Her Appearance.

Every true Christian lady knows that in order to win friends and influential people, she must put her best face as well as foot forward. For a divinely set apart lady, her appearance is very important. First impression matters a lot in life, so she must be mindful of how she looks. Though God looks at the heart, people look at what is obvious to the eye. Her external appearance must complement the true beauty that comes from her inside. Someone once said that “the way you dress is the way you are addressed”. Dressing begins with the preparation of the body followed by the putting on of clothes etc. Apart from cleaning up physically, you must clean up spiritually. Rid yourself of all bitterness, vanity etc, no matter how fabulous the dress is, it cannot cover bitterness, vanity, rancor etc. What we eat has lasting effect on our health, as well as our beauty, diet affects our appearance. It affects our skin, figure, weight and even mental clarity. I agree that diet is a very personal choice, but let us take example from Daniel (Dan 1:3-21). Being tiny should not be your ultimate goal, but eating properly to stay healthy should be your goal. You must be honest with yourself, is your diet healing you or killing you? Remember, this is the only body you have, be kind to it and take care of it. Make it a life goal to eat healthily. Divinely set apart lady practice self control in all areas of her life, including diet. Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit; do not defy it with unnecessary calories and fat. As true Christian ladies, we must take time to rest our bodies. You cannot afford not to rest, if God took time to rest Gen2:2-3, then we must follow His example and rest if we are to appear in our best forms. God created us in His image, so we are designed to rest, in order to function properly. Rest must be achieved on all levels, spiritually, emotionally and physically. It is a total package. We must know our physical limitations and take time to rest. The divinely set apart lady have no problem asking for help when she needs it, and saying “no” when a “yes” will do nobody any good. Also, you are to endeavor to keep fit with some simple exercises. Decide which exercise is best for you and your state of health. Walking is one of the most wonderful ways of staying fit. Once in a while, park the car and take a walk. It helps to keep you mentally alert. So, get out and get the blood pumping, take a short walk round your neighborhood. Talking about fashion, divinely set apart classic ladies set fashion trends, they do not follow it. Classic, simple, decent and complementary are the key words to how a classic lady dresses. Always in good taste; a divine diva dresses in a way that causes others to look twice, though nothing they are wearing is screaming from attention. Choose your color, fabric and fit well, wear clothes that is befitting of a daughter of the King. It is not how expensive an outfit is, that makes it fabulous, but it is the way it fit and how much of your body it covers that makes it a beautiful outfit. Sisters, it doesn’t matter whether that dress was made in Paris, New York, Italy or sewn by your neighborhood tailor; what matters is the fitting, the modesty and the impression it creates about you in other people’s minds. Let’s say something about our face; if you must wear makeup, it should be an enhancer and not a mask. Avoid makeovers that make you look like a masquerade or a painted doll. Do not forget your hair, whether you go natural or add extensions (weave-on, braids etc), the rule is to keep it simple. No wild colorings and other excesses. Do not forget that keeping your hair unkempt and untidy will not give you a good image. Your hair should work for you and not against you. Find a good hairdresser you like and stick with the person. Remember, your hair is your glory, so wear it well 1Cor11:15. The scent of a woman should always be alluring and intriguing. I agree that not everybody likes to use perfume, but if you are a perfume person, choose a fragrance that is you. Warm and fresh. Never overdo your fragrance, but strive to always make a personal statement about who you are with your fragrance. There are some people I know by the fragrance they wear and whenever I come in contact with that particular smell I remember them. Your fragrance should draw people close to you, and when you leave it should softly linger, leaving a pleasant memory of you in the minds of others. Finally, treat your feet well; taking care of your feet is important. After all, they support the rest of your body. The choice of shoes is endless but choose wisely; lovely but comfortable. Buy shoes that does not throw your posture out of line and you can walk gracefully. Pick shoes that complement the line of your legs. Always dress from top of your head to the tip of your toes as one complete picture; everything should work in harmony and compliment themselves. That is the secret of a true diva.

Her Character and Conduct.

Your character and conduct say a whole lot about who you are. This entails your communication skills and manners. Communication includes the following: your words; thoughts and actions or body language. As a true diva you must have an enviable communication skills. First of all, your communication must express love. Words, whether spoken or written have a tremendous impact on all our lives Pro12:18. Learn to use your words for blessing, healing and building up, and not for cursing, wounding and tearing down. Paul speaking in Eph4:29 said “Let no foul or polluting language, nor evil word nor unwholesome or worthless talk (ever) come out of your mouth, but only such (speech) as is good and beneficial to the spiritual progress of others, as is fitting to the need and the occasion, that it maybe a blessing and give grace (God’s favor) to those who hear it” (AMP). Watch your mouth! Matt12:36. Make a commitment to love others with your words. Every word you speak can be a brick to build or a bulldozer to destroy. Choose your words carefully. Remember words are seeds, they are containers of power. As a true diva avoid being labeled as “loud” or “rash”; it is not good for your image. Another area of communication is through our thoughts Pro23:7a says “for as he thinks in his heart, so is he” (AMP). Never make the mistake to think that your thoughts do not affect people. In fact, our thoughts not only affect others, they also affect us. If we think unkind thoughts, we become unkind. If we think loving thoughts, we become loving. If you let yourself dwell on negative thoughts, you will find yourself emitting bad energy to everybody around you. Of course, you will be avoided like a plague. Lastly, you communicate through your actions or body language. There is an adage that says “action speaks louder than voice”. As a true diva watch the type of body language you send out to people. Let your actions reflect the grace of God on your life. Watch the type of company you keep 1Cor15:33 admonished us that evil communication corrupts good manners. If your best friend and associates are ladies with foul language and questionable character; it is only a matter of time, and you will begin to talk and behave like them. May the Lord give us understanding!

Her Marriage.

A true diva is a virtuous wife, who knows how to turn her house into a home and enjoy a blissful marriage Pro31:10-31. A true diva knows her roles in the marriage and she carries them out religiously. Her marriage is in divine order. That is her spiritual marriage to her heavenly Husband Jesus Christ Isa54:5, and her physical marriage to her earthly husband. She has a good and to be envied relationship with the Spiritual Lover of her soul in the person of Jesus Christ. She is submissive and obedient to the dictates of her Savior, and this makes it easy for her to be submissive to the leadership of her earthly husband (she respects him, reverence, praise and honor him). She has a heart of a worshipper and her life is saturated with prayers and a childlike faith that trust God with every detail of her life and marriage. She does not have problems settling every issue of her life and marriage on her knees before her Lord. Also because she loves her Lord with all of her heart, soul and might; loving and giving affection to her husband is no problem for her. She warms his life with love. Above all, she is a true help meet and companion to her husband. She compliments him and she is not tempted to order him around.

Sisters, celebrate your unique qualities as a true diva and work them to the maximum.

It is all about Diva-tude. Attitude is everything. Remain blessed.

This is dedicated to all women out there who had been abused, misused, battered, beaten and disappointed in life. I have good news for you; you are unique, you are a Diva. One afternoon as I sat in the Presence of the Lord meditating on His faithful and the awesomeness of the Works of His Hands, I heard Him say to me “Tell them who I made them to be”, and I asked who are they Lord?

 They are Ornament of glory

  The Crowning glory of the Works of My Hands.

  They are made from the finished product to exhibit Beauty, Splendor and Glamour.

 They are a dignified specie.

 They are My Treasure. 1Cor15:41.

God did not create the woman as an afterthought but as an integral part of His Plan in creation. The woman was designed and built by God in love and with special care. He took time in fashioning the woman. Woman, your uniqueness is a reflection of God’s purpose and design for you. God wants us to know value and encourage the woman in what she was created to be. It was God who said man needed a woman Gen 2:18. Adam did not imagine the woman but God had her in mind during the creation of the earth Gen1:26-27. A woman is a product of God; this makes her God’s property, His Treasure. The creation of a woman was a beautiful structuring; the woman is a Masterpiece of the Great Architect Gen2:21-23. Welcome to the beginning of a new attitude. Attitude is everything. What you believe affects what you do, what you do affect the response you get from others or the results you receive. What you receive affects your attitude towards life, it then affects your next move in life, it further affects the outcome of your actions, which will then have a profound effect on your Joy level, Success in life, Fulfillment in marriage etc. The good news is that you can renew your mind, so that your life can be transformed into one of endless possibilities Rom12:2. In order to achieve a life of endless victory, you have to change your attitude to life. You have to change some old ideas and concepts, embrace some new concepts. You need a rebuilding of your inner woman. We need to take a serious look at not only our inner attitude but also our outer habits. What changes are you willing to make in your life? Are you willing to pay the price for your dream of a glorious destiny to come true? This is where the girls are separated from the women, the average woman from the divinely set apart woman. If you are willing to apply the principles you will learn as God takes us through these series of teachings your destiny will be changed forever. There are women who achieved the DIVA status in life; they attained this position in life through diligence and commitment to refine themselves and their gifts.


A Diva is a celebrated woman of rare and outstanding talent, a woman of class, integrity, honor and poise. A spiritually, emotionally and physically stable woman. A Diva is a divinely set apart woman. Webster dictionary defines DIVA as PRIMA DONNA a word that means First Lady. Divas are born and not made. There is a Diva inside every woman just waiting to be released.


1. She is an outstanding woman. 2. The ultimate woman. 3. She is the best in her field or career. 4. The First Lady of her home. 5. The crème de la crème. 6. Divas command attention without demanding it. There is an air of confidence, finesse, style and originality about a true Diva. 7. She is the King’s daughter. 8. A Diva never leaves a room without leaving a part of herself behind (a rich deposit of wisdom, an encouraging word). Something that leaves a lasting impression in the hearts of those who interacted with her. We attribute this special quality to God. A deposit of the divine nature of God was planted into the spirit of every woman when He created her. She was set apart for a unique purpose, with divine credentials for living out her calling. A stamp was placed on her that made everyone recognize she was special, but somewhere between infancy and womanhood something tragic happened – the Diva within was lost. The seed planted by God was crushed beneath disappointments, criticism, negative experiences, bad choices, unfruitful behaviors etc. Woman, the Lord is saying to you right now, it is time to shake off the dust and let the true Diva seed blossom and unfold Isa52:1-2. It is time to shake yourself from the dust of debasement and distress of false doctrines, superstition and will worship. God is calling you to sit upon the throne of your glory. 2Pt 1:3. There is need for us to embrace the fullness of our relationship with God, take and use His advice in every area of our lives so as to come out like the true Divas that we really are. In order to become this Total Outstanding and Victorious package, we need to make sure everything in our lives is in divine order– Spiritually, Emotionally and Physically. It is time to listen to God for He alone holds the valid opinion of who you are. He knows, sees and understands everything about you. He is Straightforward, Honest and ever optimistic about your divine possibilities. A true Diva is spiritual. She has embraced her Savior and yielded to the Lordship of Jesus Christ.


1. Discard the negative, absorb the positive. 2. Do not volunteer to be a victim. 3. Examine your friends and associates. 4. Find out what God has to say about the real you. 5. Protect what is precious to you, that is your heart, your body and your love. Pro4:23 6. Cultivate your Character and Gifts. 7. Take one day at a time, see the big picture God has painted of your life and work towards actualizing it. 8. Speak the truth, but always with graciousness and gentility. Let your goal be to encourage and not to destroy. 9. Do not seek to control, manipulate or cause others to depend heavily on you. 10. Be driven to empower others; this is where the true power lies. Unto us a Diva is born and unto us a divinely set apart woman is given.

Pro 14:1 “Every wise woman builds her house, but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands” (AMP).

Pro 12:4 “A virtuous and worthy wife (earnest and strong in character) is a crowning joy to her husband….” (AMP) For you to excel in life and in the family as a homemaker, you need wisdom.

Pro 4:7-9, admonishes us to befriend wisdom, for she will give to our heads a wreath of gracefulness, a crown of beauty and glory will she deliver to us, if we allow her to direct us, she will bring to us profiting in all our endeavors including homemaking.

What is a Home?

A home is a dwelling place, but not every dwelling place is a home. A home is a place where you live, especially with your family. It is your haven; a place you go to for comfort, peace and tranquility. A place of safety, where the hostility happening outside cannot reach you. The difference between a house and a home is the presence of a wise woman. A wise woman transforms her house into a home by her actions; she is the one according to the scriptures that builds the house, transforming it into a home, which becomes a safe place for herself, her loved ones and everyone who comes her way. She turns the mortar and bricks of the house into a home, where love, joy, peace and hospitality can be felt. A woman who allows the wisdom of God to direct her affairs in life is the heartthrob of her husband. She is the Virtuous woman of Proverb 31:10-31. The kingdom of God is a kingdom of choices, God will only advice you, but whatever is your choice, you will receive the reward. The choice is yours, either to be a wise builder or a destroyer Deut30:15-20. In fact, you are a product of the choices you made yesterday. I can hear the Spirit say, choose well today so that you can have a better tomorrow.

How do you build a house and transform it into a home as a wise woman?

Pro24:3-4 “Through skillful and godly wisdom is a house (a life, a home, a family) built and by understanding it is established (on a sound and good foundation). And by knowledge shall all its chambers (of every area) be filled with all precious and pleasant riches” (AMP).

Pro 9:1 “Wisdom has built her house she has hewn out and set her seven (perfect number of) pillars” (AMP).

Let us look at the seven vital pillars for transforming the house into a home.

A. Qualitative Walk with God. Matt 6:33. God desires that you develop your spiritual life in order to be a wise homebuilder. You are to examine your heart condition towards God. If your relationship with your Maker is in order it will reflect in your relationship with your family, that is your husband and children. Without Christ, your life is like a super car without key, you cannot get it started, make it work or use it. You cannot go anywhere with it. A relationship with God is the key to all life situations, including your marriage. God alone possesses the instruction manual for your marriage and that wonderful home you dream of. The first pillar in building that wonderful home you desire and deserve is seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness. As you do this diligently, shunning all distractions from within and without, Jesus Himself will see to it that your house is transformed into a home. Decide today to put God first every day of your life, and your life and marriage will never be the same again.

B. Be a Supportive Teammate. Eccl 4:9-12. Your house can only be transformed into a home, if you accept your role as a supportive teammate with your husband. You are to compliment his efforts and not to order him around. You have an important part to play in making your house a safe haven for your loved ones. We women, tend to forget that the success of the marriage depends on us as much as it depends on the man. If we refuse to play out our role in the marriage, what we will have at the end of the day is a “madhouse” where everything is in chaos instead of the blissful home we desired and deserved.

Let us quickly remind ourselves of the roles of husbands and wives:


He is the head, so he is to lead in the marriage and family, before the fall, the man and his wife were doing their things their own way; but after the fall a new order was set in place Gen3:16; Eph5:22-24 and Col3:18. In the same way you submit to the Lord, you are to willingly follow your husband’s leadership. He is to work and provide for his wife and children 1Tim5:8. He is to love his wife as Christ loved the Church Eph5:25.


She is to help her husband, as wives we are God’s solution to our husbands’ need for a helper and companion. We are to submit to our husbands, this is a non negotiable commandment to wives from God. We must adapt ourselves to our husbands’ leadership and their way of leading. You are expected to respect your husband as a Christian wife, you are to reverence, respect, praise and honor your husband; failure to do this, is a sin in the eyes of God. If you have a good relationship with God carrying out this commandment will be cheap and easy for you. You are to love your husband that is be affectionate, treat your husband in a loving manner, cherish him and enjoy him as your best friend. To build a priceless home, you must follow God’s plan for your life and marriage. Do not postpone your obedience to your roles as a wife or make it conditional to your husband’s fulfillment of his assignment. Do not wait for your husband to change before you perform your roles. Instead of rating our husbands, let us check ourselves and prayerfully ask God to help us make amend where we are lacking in carrying out our roles. No matter who our husbands are, and their spiritual condition our roles still remains: Help; Follow; Respect and Love Your husband’s failures and shortcoming in discharging his duties does not give you the right to sin.

C. A Quality Prayer Life. Lk 18:1-8. Jesus admonished us that we ought to pray and not to faint. How is your prayer life? Most of us leave the praying to our husbands, agreed that they are our spiritual heads, but as their help meet it is also part of our assignment from God to pray for our family. In fact, we are to pray without ceasing 1Thess 5:17. You are the spiritual watchman of that home. The biblical positions of the “watchman” are: on the way of the city; walking about in the city and on the hills and mountain tops. You are to observe closely the activities going on within the house; make your family ready to accept the Lord and be obedient to His word, that is prepare them for eternity; to recognize and confront disorderly or unruly behavior within the home; to report all disobedience to the Spiritual High Priest of your home. Also you are to patrol the borders of your home, watching out for any encroachment of the enemy long before any attack is launched against your home. You can only carry out your duties as a watchman of your home by effective fervent prayer. As a watchman you must be able to hear from the Lord and warn the family Ezk3:17. To put it bluntly, your husband is where he is today by virtue of the amount of time you spent praying for him; the same goes for the state of affairs in your marriage. You cannot enjoy a blissful home standing straight, your knees must be bent in prayers always; because the devil does not like you as long as you do not belong to him, and you can only fight him on your knees. Whether you are engaged in prayers of thanksgiving; praise/worship; supplication; request or petition, your knees must be in a bent position. Let me tell you one secret why you must engage in meaningful prayer time; no matter how difficult your husband is, your prayers to God everyday concerning him, will change him to the kind of man you desire and deserve; and he will find himself doing things for you he never thought he could do. Friends, prayer works faster than nagging, try it and you will not regret it. To raise godly children we need prayers, because our children are likely to mix with some other children with questionable backgrounds in their schools and work places; it is our duty as mothers to pray and our prayers will help mold them in the way of the Lord Gen18:19; 2Tim3:15.

D. A Meaningful Intimacy Song of Sol. 7:1-12. It is God’s idea that sexual intimacy be a holy and confined blessing in marriage; however temporary the excitement of sexual expression may be, its abuse will bring enormous heart break and suffering. Sexual union is reserved for marriage alone Ex 20:14; Pr5:15-20. The bible teaches that sexual intimacy is to be enjoyed regularly so that the couple may avoid temptations 1Cor7:3-5. Sexual intercourse is an intimate expression of affection between husband and wife. In fact the bible says it is a duty the husband and wife own to each other, they are to be available to each other and not to deprive one another except by mutual agreement and only for a short period of time least satan tempts them for lack of self control. Christian couple should never engage in sexual selfishness, and as a Christian wife never use your body as a means of exploiting your husband, whether directly or indirectly. It is a sin, if you practice this shameful act you are not better than the harlot on the street who sells her body for what she can gain from men Pro7:10-21. There are better ways of getting your husband to do things for you than using your body. May the Lord give us understanding.

E. Hospitality Proverbs 31:20. As a Christian wife you must be hospitable. Remember your husband came out of a family. He was raised in a family that includes parents, siblings and other extended relations. You are to show love to them, the fact that the bible says a man should leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, does not mean you are to neglect your parents in law and not respect and show them love. Remember the bible says honor your father and mother. Once you marry, your husband’s parents become your parents, so you must extend to them the same honor and respect you have for your parents. The scriptures tell us that whatsoever you sow you will reap Gal6:7, one day you will become a mother in law and the same treatment you gave to your mother in law will be given to you; I hope you enjoy it when the time comes. Eph5:1-2 advices us to be imitators of God and walk in love; pay evil deeds with good deeds and the Lord will reward you with the desire of your heart which is a blissful marriage and a happy home. Take example from Ruth in the bible Ruth 1:16-17, she respected her mother in law, she was loyal to her; she was a humble and teachable daughter in law. She served her mother in law from her heart and the Lord rewarded her by putting her name in the Book of the genealogy of His Son Jesus Christ Matt1:5. Write your name in gold in the heart of your loved ones by being a daughter in law and a mother in law after God’s Heart.

F. Good Money Management Proverbs 27:23-27. Money management is a sensitive issue in most marriages, but with the wisdom of God, the nightmare surrounding money management in marriage can be turned to a thing of joy. Managing money is an act that only the Holy Spirit can teach. You either manage money or it will manage you. In the book of Proverbs, the Holy Spirit showed us five keys to good money management. As a Christian wife, you are the Chief Accountant of your home, so you must be a skilled money manager in order for your husband to trust you with his money. The reason most husbands are not open to their wives about their true financial position is lack of trust. They do not trust their wives with money; so in order not to go bankrupt they remain close as a clam on money matters; this is not right, there should be absolute openness in marriage. My husband is completely and absolutely open with me concerning his financial position, because he knows that I am for him and not against him; he does not have to hide his cheque book from me, why? Because financially he trust me. If your husband is not opened to you financially, check yourself and the foundation upon which you built your marriage.

Let us consider these five nuggets of good money management from the Scriptures:

(1) Good Accounting System Pr 27:23: How good is your record keeping? Keep a good track of what you own, owe, earn and spend.

(2) Planning Pr 21:5: Have a budget; planning how we spend money is essential to good stewardship. Planned spending brings satisfaction while “impulse buying” can have devastating consequences.

(3) Saving Pr 21:20: If you plan well and spend wisely you should be able to save for the rainy day.

(4) Contentment Pr 15:16: More money is equal to joy and peace of mind. To have plenty of money to spend is very good no doubt, but it is the contentment we have with whatever is in our hands today that brings enjoyment and joy in the Holy Ghost Phil 4:11.

(5) Giving Pr 3:9-10: Honour God with whatever income or resources you have. As a good money manager, you can always squeeze out something from a very tight budget to give to the Lord; it is not in the quantity but in the quality. As you do this, you allow the Lord to reign in your life and begin a divine cycle of blessing for you.

G. Kingdom Service Col3:23-24. Every Christian is to serve the Lord. You are saved to serve, and not to be served. Your service is unto God and not unto man, this is the truth that brings dignity to service, in whatever capacity you are called to serve do it as unto the Lord. As a Christian wife interested in transforming her house to a home, bear the following in mind as you pursue your kingdom service:

Serve those at home first. Never give to others, what you have not first given to those in your home. Your first service is to your husband and children. Jesus speaking in Acts 1:8: we are to be witnesses to Him first in Jerusalem, in all Judea and Samaria before the end of the earth. Your family is your Jerusalem so that is the first place to start your kingdom service.

Serve with your husband’s blessing and support. Before you go into ministry or volunteer to help in any way at the Church ask your husband first. Submit that vision you have to your husband, he is your spiritual head. To go off with the vision without his blessing is to be running around town without a head. If the vision is genuinely from God your husband will support it wholeheartedly, for God is not the Author of confusion, He will defend whatever He authors. When I told my husband about the vision the Lord gave me concerning Family Life and the Newsletter publication; he supported me wholeheartedly and gave me his blessing. In fact he is my Editor in Chief; I do the writing but he still find time from his busy schedule to edit every issue of the newsletter published by us. Because I have the support of my spiritual head it will be difficult for the devil to kill the vision or use the vision to destroy my marriage.

Serve in whatever capacity you can. You are to serve with a grateful heart to the Lord. No service is too menial for you to do for the Lord. You can sweep, sing, evangelise, etc. Whatever your hands and heart leads to do, do as unto the Lord. The Master needs the open hands, the willing feet and the praying heart.

As we put these seven perfect pillars together in their proper place, may the Lord transform our houses into homes where all the Christian graces are available in abundance Gal 5:22-23 May our homes become city of refuge to our loved ones and a place of comfort for all the Lord will bring our way in Jesus Name. Amen.

Beloved, you are about to read accounts of some women in the Bible times, who in spite of their circumstances and challenges of life, were used by God to bring about His Eternal design for mankind. Though, these are Eastern women who lived in ancient times, yet their stories apply to our lives and the difficult issues we face in our world today. These women were on the edge; they had courage, took risk, did unexpected things, lived daring lives and made mistakes. These women were not perfect, but God in His Infinite mercy used them in His Eternal Plans and Purpose for mankind. There are lessons we can learn from them, that when applied in our own life situations will help us fulfill God’s design for our lives.

 EVE GEN4:25

The First Woman

Eve was a redemptive instrument in the Hands of God. We know from the bible that God created Adam and Eve, and that all mankind are descendants of these ancient couple. While Eve was deceived by the serpent, and the first to violate the divine regulations governing their life Gen2:16-17, the Word of God holds Adam as the disobedient one, who knowingly broke trust with God 1Tim2:14.This does not mean that the woman was less intelligent or more vulnerable to deception than man, but under the circumstances of the Fall of man, deception of the woman preceded active disobedience of man. It is remarkable to note that God in His Infinite mercy and divine Grace chose to bring about the redemption of man from the yoke of sin, through the Seed of the woman. The one first scarred by sin is selected to be the one first promised to become an instrument of God’s redemptive work Gen3:15. The birth of Seth, the “seed” given to replace the murdered Abel, was the first in the “bloodline” that will trace to the birth of the Lord Jesus Christ. Eve’s distinct place in the failure of the first couple becomes the soil in which God’s mercy plants the first seed of promise. The lesson is obvious, however deep the failure, God’s grace is deeper, “for He is able to make all grace abound towards of us”.

 JOCHEBED EX6:20; NUM26:59

Preserver of A Nation.

Though mentioned only twice in the bible, she emerges as an intricate part of the divine will in the redemption of Israel. Distinguished as Moses’ mother, she is pivotal in the preservation of his life.Ex2:2-3, an action that is described as faith filled and courageous Heb11:23. The personal effort and work of her hands coincided with her faith in the saving grace of God. Faith does not absolve us of responsibility in utilizing the resources, gifts and abilities given us by God Jas2:17-18. The decision to surrender the child to the water was a total affirmation of her confidence in God. Jochebed not only saved her son, but was used by God through devotion and diligence to preserve a nation. The lesson we learn from her encounter with destiny is that, to know whom we believe, encourages us to place our most valued possession in His care 2Tim1:12. This is the focus of faith, not merely what we believe, that is understanding a particular promise, but knowing Jesus the Author and Finisher of our faith Heb12:2; focusing on the Person behind the promise more than the promise itself. Vital faith rests in Him Heb4:9-10; abides in Him Jn15:4&7 and cannot be separated from Him by any circumstances or power Rom8:38-39.


A Godly Quest for Equal Rights.

Zelophehad, a Gileadite, of the tribe of Manasseh had no sons, but had five daughters who set a legal precedent in Israel. Their names were: Mahlah meaning “Sickness” or “Disease”; Noah meaning “Rest” or “Comfort”; Hoglah meaning “Partridge” of “Boxer”; Milcah meaning “Queen” or “Counsel” and Tirzah meaning “Pleasantness”. If we accept the names of these women as pictures of their abilities, natures, or adversities they had to overcome, then we see all the qualities necessary for the tenacity, tact, courage, wisdom and grace they needed to request and receive an inheritance for themselves. Their presentation of their case to Moses and the Elders of Israel (Num27:2), when land was being shared to the tribes, is the first instance of an appeal for equal rights for women. All five daughters manifest a balance between a spirit of confrontation and a spirit of cooperation. They attacked injustice Num27:3-4, and God defended them when they allowed Him to be their Deliverer/Provider Num27:6-7. Their wisdom in trusting God to see that they were not denied their request paid off. They reveal a contemporary pathway to overcoming inequality while sustaining a godly spirit.


The Spirit filled Multitalented Woman.

Deborah whose name means “Honeybee” was a prophetess, and she rose in ancient Israel as a female Judge, whose multiple leadership functions demonstrate the possibilities available to any woman who will allow God’s Spirit to fill and form her life. Deborah also acquired a reputation as a wise settler of disputes, counselor, wife and deliverer in time of war. She was a mother in Israel Judg5:7. She became a celebrated leader of political influence and authority, while maintaining the grace and dignity of womanhood. Her successful mobilization of Israelite militia demonstrated her leadership ability and spiritual insight. Because of Deborah’s godly and skillful leadership traits, Barak (as Commander of Israel’s armies) would not go to battle without her, even when told that he would not get full honor for the victory Judg4:9. Under her leadership, the people witnessed God’s providential assistance in the form of a massive storm and the defeat of Sisera’s superior armed forces. Deborah represents the finest possibilities of a gifted, God fearing woman who allows the Spirit of God to develop her full potentials to impact the world around.

 HANNAH 1SAM1:2-20

The Woman God Remembered.

Hannah whose name means “grace” had to contend with a situation that exhibited the exact opposite of her name. She was barren. Barrenness was the ultimate tragedy for a married Hebrew woman. The inability to perpetuate the name of her husband, and secure the orderly transfer of his estate upon his death, often resulted in insecurity, humiliation and disgrace 1Sam1:6-7. Even in our contemporary world, there is a social stigma attached to being barren. Hannah had something to her credit; she was a woman of prayer, faith and strong desires. Her prayer in 1Sam1:10-11 demonstrates the proper way to handle situations over which we have no control. She sought God for what only He could do Ps34:15. God used the burden of Hannah’s heart to bring about a surprisingly, larger solution to the burden of His own Heart.      Barrenness was not only Hannah’s condition; it was Israel’s condition as well. It was a season of spiritual need and little prophetic activity 1Sam3:1. God sought a voice to speak on His behalf to His People. Little did Hannah know that her intense intercession for a child was moving in concert with God. He gave her a son and also brought forth His will and blessing for a whole nation 1Sam3:19-20. Hannah’s prophetic prayer in 1Sam2:1-10 reveals much regarding her spiritual maturity and insight, she was filled with joy, she recognised God’s Holiness and Strength; His Sovereignty and Grace. As we entrust the longings of our hearts to God, He moves on our behalf, but also advances His larger plan through us at the same time.

 ABIGAIL 1SAM 25:2-35

A Woman of Understanding

Her life was difficult in that she married a harsh and evil man (Nabal), but she was a woman of good understanding, she was wise, respectful and kept her heart right before the Lord. When her husband played the fool (1Sam25:25), she did not try to change his behaviour, but she intervened wisely by interceding for the lives of her people. She took up the role of a peacemaker 1Sam25:18-51. She was also a woman of courage under pressure, she turned from her own short sighted agenda to God’s eternal purpose. She did not allow revenge for all she had suffered in the hands of Nabal to blind her to take a wrong step. Her courage resulted in a great deliverance for her household. As a wise woman, her wisdom in effect surrounded and protected her mind, thereby bringing honour to her household Pr12: 4a. Finally, she was a godly woman; she knew God and His ways. As a result, God could use her to powerfully influence others, even a king. As a godly woman, abiding in the Holy Spirit, learn to trust in the insight and understanding the Lord gives you concerning the affairs of your home. A godly woman adorns herself with a spirit that is not self-exacting, or casting herself as her husband’s teacher, but seeking ways of being a true helpmeet for her husband, in order for him to fulfil his God given vision. She receives insights from the Lord and with a humble spirit relates it to her husband for the good of the marriage. A woman who cultivates her relationship with God first, then relates appropriately to her husband will powerfully influence him in every area of his life.

 HULDAH 2KINS22:3-20

The Woman and Today’s Prophetic Possibilities

The name Huldah is derived from the Hebrew root word “cheled” which means “to glide swiftly”. Her name probably reflects her quickness of mind and her ability to swiftly and rightly discern the things of God. She was used by God in a fleeting moment of history to voice His judgment and His prophecy, and to spark off one of the greatest national revival in the history of Israel. She is a case study of the character and the potential of a woman, who today will receive the Holy Spirit’s fullness and step through whatever open door God provides. She commanded the respect and confidence of the High Priest Hilkiah and Shaphan the Scribe, this shows that spiritual influence flows from spiritual lifestyle, not merely from the presence of spiritual gifts. Acts 2:17-18 promises that the Church age allows for a rapid increase of the Holy Spirit’ anointing upon women. Huldah’s example of respectful, trust begetting, forthright living teaches on the grounds for wise and effective spiritual ministry.


Rising to meet your Destiny.

The account of Esther unfolds the way God opens destiny to any person who will keep His priorities. Esther was a Jewish orphan, a virtual nonentity, raised by her cousin Mordecai. Esther’s Hebrew name was Hadassah which means “Myrtle”, she reflected the myrtle in her courage and obedience, which clearly did not wither even in the face of death Esth 4:16. In Persian, “Esther” means “Star”. Again her beauty, grace and character shone bright and unwavering, against the darkness that threatened her people Esth 5:1-8; Esth 7:1-10. Even in the presence of recognition, success, wealth and luxury, an environment many covet, but which has so often proven destructive to spiritual commitment, Esther retained her sense of perspective and integrity. The following are the lessons to be learnt from her account:

1. She recognized God’s providence in her placement in life: she believed God, and not her beauty put her on the throne Esth 4:14.

2. Her respect for the power of prayer and fasting: she recognized the reality of the spiritual realm and the Holy Spirit’s resources Esth 4:16.

3. Finally, her unswerving will to lay down her own life for others and her wisdom and patience in pursuing her enterprise.

 MARY LUKE 1:26-56

Faithful Mother: Obedient Disciple.

Mary loved the Lord from her childhood; she was devoted to God, brought up in the way of the Lord. She was a virgin, uneducated, from a poor background. To make matters worse, she lived in an obscured village that most Jews disdain, Nazareth Jn 1:46. Above all, she was a privileged vessel, chosen to bear God’s Son. She was a participant in the miracle of incarnation at a level no other human being can comprehend. It is clear she did not claim to understand it herself, but simply worship God in humble acknowledgment of the phenomenon engulfing her existence: “My soul magnifies the Lord” she exclaimed Lk 1:46. We can hardly fathom the bewildering moments she experienced when:

1. Simon prophesied future mental/emotional suffering Lk 2:34-35.

2. She and Joseph spoke with Jesus after they thought He was lost in Jerusalem Lk 2:40-50.

3. Jesus gently rebuffed her at the wedding in Cana Jn2:4.

4. Jesus seemed to reject her and His brothers’ efforts at helping Him, though they clearly misunderstood Him at that time Matt 12:46-50.

These instances teaches us the wisdom of persistence and obedience in following God’s basic directives on our lives, even when the details of the outworking of His Will are unclear or mystifying. Mary is a case study in the pathway forward in God’s will. Rather than using her position as the Mother of Jesus, to sought elevation in authority and influence for herself, among those who saw Jesus for who He was; Messiah, she remained steadfast with Him all the way to the Cross, not caring for her own protection Jn 19:25. She obediently joined the other disciples of Jesus in the Upper Room, waiting as He commanded, for the coming of the Holy Spirit Acts1:14. Mary was a model of responsive obedience, one who lived out her own directive to the servants at Cana. A timeless advice for all ages “whatever He (Jesus) says to you, do it” Jn2:5.


An Empowered Witness.

The story of the woman of Samaria teaches us a classic lesson in God’s redemptive action. Looking at the scenario critically, a lot of factors were against the woman:

1. The ongoing contempt of Jews for Samaritans Jn 4:9.

2. The reputation of the woman Jn 4:18.

3. The cultural restrictions of male and female interaction Jn 4:27.

But Jesus initiative forgave, restored and empowered her to persuade men to heed a Jewish Messiah. A transformed woman became a great evangelistic influence, as many Samaritans responded to Jesus as Messiah Jn 4: 29-30, 39-41.
Our Savior’s grace, seen in this woman of Samaria, illustrates how prejudices, beliefs, practices and exposures need not confine or destroy the potential of a person. An unnamed Samaritan woman received life changing revelation that eluded many learned scholars (1Cor 1:26-29). Spiritual insight that propelled her to another dimension; perceiving Jesus as a “prophet” Jn 4:19, then as “Christ” Jn 4:29. She is a model of how true revelation can translate into a powerful witness.

 DORCAS ACTS 9:36-41

Practical Ministry: Helps and Hospitality.

Dorcas was a devout and compassionate woman, whose acts of generosity improved the quality of life for the less privileged in the community. Her concern extended beyond prayer, to various sorts of practical services of hospitality. She was noted for her aid to the poor, in particular to widows, for whom she served and did noble deeds Prov31:20. Because of her interest in the matter that touches the very heart of God; that is caring for the poor, the marginalized, the homeless, the widows, the orphans etc. God rose up in her defense when death came knocking on her door Prov19:17; Heb6:10. Through her ministry of Helps and Hospitality, her community experienced the manifested love of God.


Women and New Testament Ministry.

The reference to Philips’ daughters each exercising the gifts of prophecy, makes clear that women did bring God’s word by the power of the Holy Spirit, and that such ministry was fully accepted in the early Church. Paul reinforced this in 1Cor11:5, where he directs that a woman may ‘prophesy, but she must be properly “covered”, that is, rightly related to her husband or other spiritual authority’. Women were also in the Upper room, waiting the Holy Spirit’s coming and the birth of the Church Acts1:14. Peter’s prophetic sermon at Pentecost affirmed the Old Testament promise was now realised: “your daughters” and “maidservants” would now, share fully and equally with men in realising the anointing, fullness and ministry of the Holy Spirit, making them effective in witness and service for the spread of the Gospel. For example:

Phoebe was mentioned as a servant of the Church probably a deaconess. John’s letter to an elect (chosen) Lady with instruction concerning who she allows to minister in her “house” (a designation for early church fellowship) 2John.

Priscilla and her husband mentioned as co workers with Paul were more like a husband/wife teaching team Rom16:3-4. The acceptance of women in public place ministry in the Church is not a concession to the spirit of feminist movement, but the refusal of such a place might be a concession to an order of male chauvinism, unwarranted by and unsupported in the Scriptures. Clearly, women are to be encouraged to use their God given gifts to evangelize Christ in their homes and neighbourhood. Acts2:17; Acts18:24-26; Phil4:2-3.